Sports Report...... 25th May 2011

After last week’s surprise defeat at the hands of Clehongers finest, mighty Brecon regained some pride and top spot at the expense of a brave but ultimately doomed Tram Wheels side. Top spot indeed, but perhaps only by dint of fact that close rivals, New Inn, did not play and so now have a game in hand. Early days, but it’s felt that this one could go to the wire.
Alors! Les Grosmonts find themselves in third place after their comprehensive win over our Almeley friends. The unfortunate Bells are finding life in the premiership a trifle tougher than living in the Conference – but they’ve won one and drawn one so far so there is hope.
Those perennial yo-yo’s the Seven Stars made a little history by sticking one on the Strand & Deliver team at the New Strand Inn. Thus, the Twinklies now lie in fourth spot on 10 points ahead of Aberdoodah, Sundowners, Cruisers and the Strand who all have seven precious points apiece. Tail-end-Charlie’s, namely Nags Head ‘A’ managed a decent draw against Averhonda but still lie bottom and a little adrift of the rest.... still there is time....!
It’s all change in the Conference where the Cross Angels, who stuffed New Inn Too, have now moved atop the div. Nomads plummet to second place after their draw with Tram Sleepers whilst newcomers Madley Lions, who drew with Bridge Inn, stay in third position. All nicely boiling up to a tense and exciting finish in .....er.... four months time!
After five straight defeats, The Yew Tree finally gained their first win of the season. Their victims were the Black Swans who themselves were looking good after winning both opening triples ..... but then lost the following four games. All credit to the Yews.
Nags Head ‘B’ are floundering as are their Div one counterparts Nags ‘A’. The draw with Tram Tracks has done little to improve their lowly position and this has resulted in a weeping and wailing in the fair city of Peterchurch. Oh dear, is life worth living one asks?

Sports Report...... 1st June
As champs Brecon could only field a five man team, Bells Almeley took full advantage and
smote them mightily – well four games to two anyway. Is this the beginning of the end of Brecon’s iron grasp on the league? Who can tell! Whilst Brecon were floundering, Our New Inn friends failed miserably to take advantage and could only draw with bottom team Nags ‘A’. Amongst all this mayhem, Les ange de Grosmont, calmly and with aplomb, saw off lowly Tram Wheels thus maintaining third spot and threatening the top two. Dizzy heights for les ange and Jon P is said to be suffering from a nosebleed.
In Div two, Madley Lions were mauled by Tilly Tigers and came down to earth with the proverbial. Nomads vertical piste was probably their undoing. No complaints we hope as is always stated, a piste is a piste. Ron’s Bridge brutes battered a bereft Tram Sleepers team to go fourth just behind the Golds who also did the business against the Swans.
Tram Tracks enjoyed a rare victory as they toppled leaders Cross Angels from top spot. Tracks are the draw specialist at the moment. Five points separate the top seven teams which is making for a absorbing ... nay fascinating competition.
A rant.
Mainly aimed at Division Two. Score sheets have not been filled in correctly. I would ask captains to write Christian and surnames on sheets. This is to ensure that there is no cross-over of players to different teams during the season.
I actually received a score sheet this week with no team names or date or surnames whatsoever written on the sheet. ‘Spose I should be grateful that the scores were entered. Rant over.

~ Sports Report ~ 15th June 2011
Last week’s top four teams all drew on Wednesday which led to Alan’s Cruisers sailing up the table to berth in fourth spot. Keeping to the nautical theme, they shot several broadsides (five actually) into the Nags Head topsides and thus left the Nags firmly shipwrecked and anchored to the sea bed. Would you fathom it? ( Ha-ha...fathom..geddit! Please yourself! ).
Further up the table, the Twinklies maintained third place by unexpectedly drawing with that legendary and famed New Inn team. Our Staunton friends have some great players but it has to be said that young Shaun was outstanding on the day. His shooting and pointing was more than exemplary and he has to be amongst the best three players in the league – if not the very best. Oh how I hate him......!
The every-improving Sundowners drew with leaders Brecon, but what a match. Being two – nil down after the triples, the Sundowners snatched a thrilling draw winning their three remaining games by the narrowest of margins. It’s what it’s all about folks. And, down in the deep south, L’equipe de Strand avec Deliver et les Ange de Grosmont drew an equally thrilling match and so leaves both teams middling in the table but certainly not out of the hunt. Alors.... Formidable!
Alas, Team Aberhairdo continued their downward slide after losing yet again. This time to the unpredictable Tram Wheels. Sam’s Wheelies are finding some form and could certainly be a threat to anyone in future games.
And so, it’s getting ever so tight with only four points separating second placed New Inn and seventh placed Strand. Who’s feeling the strain? Who’s feeling the pressure? Who’s feeling the stress? Who’s gonna crack first? Who’s writing this rubbish???
Yes folks, and for a laugh, we’ve wheeled last year’s raving loon out of the cupboard to make predictions for the next round of matches.

Do you have a Raving Loon in your team? If so - ask him/her to send in their predictions.
In Div Two, Nomads are maintaining their irresistible charge towards glory and the premiership. The luckless victims this time were the Mucky Ducks of Letton. Still, as we losers of the Seven Stars always say.... It’s only a game! Vanessa’s young Golds move to second place after inflicting a second defeat in two weeks on a stunned Bridge team. Close though, four games to two and 67 to 60 points.
Cross Angels put paid to the Young Lions and Nags Head ‘B’ felt the wrath of Avrils Sleepers. Hopefully, our new friends from Peterchurch are not too downhearted. They can be assured that they will get a win sooner or later and when they do......!!! We of the Seven Stars won a game once and morale went sky high – Indeed, half the team are still celebrating. Unfortunately, they’ve forgotten what for – drunken louts!

~Sports Report~ 22nd June.
Nearly at the half-way point and only one point separates the top four teams. Last year’s champs, the mighty Brecon, drop to third place as they, along with everyone else, failed to beat the Bye team.
Sundowners six game unbeaten run came to a sticky end when they visited those Staunton lovelies – The New Inn - who themselves now lie in second place. Had New Inn won with five or six games, they would be tops – but they dain’t - so they ain’t !
Je veux parlé la francais but I can’t so I’ll say it in l’ Anglais. Well done Grosmont Angels who are up to fourth place and only one point behind the leaders. And to think.... this time last season both Angel and the leaders were locked in mortal and bloody conflict as they struggled to avoid the big drop! How times have changed.
Speaking of the big drop, Nags ‘A’, Bells and Aberdodo all lost and are now somewhat adrift of the pack. In recent years, the required number of points required to avoid relegation has been 21. (Believe me, I know).
That said, there’s still a long way to go.
Unbeaten Nomads are marching on relentlessly and now head the table by a clear five points after giving the Bridge Inn what for. Surprise result of the week was Yew Tree’s thrashing of the Cross Angels. Bet they’re even crosser now.
Good week for Eardisley with Strand, Wheels, Tracks all winning and Sleepers getting a draw against the Golds. Also, Madley Lions stopped their losing run by drawing with the Mucky Ducks.
Last week, predictions were invited and Ben of the Nomads sent his twopenn’th worth in.
Both Jim and Mystic Ben scored 5 out of 10 so perhaps not a good idea for anyone to ask us to pick their lottery numbers. If anyone wants to forecast next week’s results, feel free and will publish on the website.
Finally, many thanks for the speedy submission of result sheets. There will be very wet slobbery kisses all round when I see you next.

Sports Report 6th July
A soggy day in Hereford Town saw both New Inn and Brecon a la tete de la course put some distance between them and the peloton – but this time, it’s doubtful that the peloton will be doing any winding in. ( Yes dears – I’ve been watching leTour de France).
New Inn travelled down to Grosmont and sneaked a narrow win against les anges whilst Taffy overwhelmed the favourite sons of Peterchurch winning 5 games to 1. This could be the start of an exciting two horse race. Though having said that, only a raving loon would discount some of the following pack.
Strand and Deliver have sneaked into fourth place having duffed-up the Bells of Almeley and Tram Wheels, who have now gone four games unbeaten, managed a creditable draw with fellow piste-mates Sundowners.
Leisure Cruisers find themselves in mid-table after their draw with Aberdabbadoo and are perhaps feeling quietly confident of maintaining their place in the Premiership. As for our Welsh friends, they have finally halted a run of defeats (four!) with this welcome draw.
Seven Stars had a dry bye and I myself spent a hugely pleasurable evening in Madley Church enjoying drinks and nibbles whilst listening to the famed and talented Hereford Fire Choir. Some of the songs sung were Stormy Weather, It’s Raining in my Heart, The Day that the Rains Came Down, Singin’ in the Rain, Don’t Rain on my Parade and The Sun ain’t gonna shine anymore. My thoughts did briefly turn to the Marches Petanque League.... but only briefly!
In Div two, it’s a pleasure to report that Nags Head ‘B’ have finally won a game, thus emulating their clubmates who enjoyed their first win of the season last week and this against the once table-topping Seven Stars – Still, the less said about that the better. Nags ‘B’s victims were the Black Swans who themselves are having a somewhat topsy-turvy season so far.
Nomads march onwards with another (almost) predictable win, this time agin a plummeting Yew Tree side and they now lead the table by eight points. The premiership beckons.
But look who’s in second place – none other than Vanessa’s shining Golds – and by a clear three points. They mullered fellow promotion hopefuls Cross Angels by a six games to nil. The Golds next game is against New Inn Too. This has the making of a minor classic and could eventually determine who goes up. Great stuff!
That said, Tram Sleepers are sneaking up on the rails and are starting to look a little ugly (not you Avril - obviously). A decisive win against the Tracks puts Avril’s team into fifth place which is an achievement after their dreadful start to the season.
New Inn Too lying fourth after a good win against the Madley Lions are also in the promotion hunt, but as for our Madley friends, they seem to have slipped somewhat after a bright start. For them, the premiership does NOT beckon...... Not yet anyway.
Don’t forget folks – Closed Singles this Sunday (10th July). Oh! ... and a shooting contest for those interested. Weather forecast is not bad so should be a good day.
Lastly, Committee Meeting at the Strand 8pm Monday 11th. Your chance to make your voice heard – Agenda on the website.

Sports Report 13th July 2011
Special report from Jon Pearce of the Angel Inn Petanque Club. A GAME OF TWO HALVES
 
Les Grosmonts arrived for their match with the Seven Stars resplendent in their new tops, obviously ordered by a man with no idea of the expanding girth of the team. The Angels put their best beer bellies forward and dealt the Stars a savaging to go 2-0 up after the triples.
Following up, the Angels unleashed the French contingent against the Stars Blair and Jane, while Martin and Steve took on Shirley and Danny. At one stage the Angels were leading 11-2 and 8-6, the Stars looking like a rabbit caught in the headlights. But it ain't over till the fat lady sings and the Stars roared back to deliver a counter blow, taking both doubles to square the match at 2-2.
In the singles, Stars Andy took on Nell, with the respective captains Jim and Jon taking the other tie. The Stars completed their fight back taking both singles, with Andy the stand out player with point and bomb.
Long into the night Neil could be heard muttering under his breath "damn" "damn". The Frenchman shook their heads in bemusement at letting an 11-2 lead slip, and Angels Captain Jon wondered how his team managed to outpoint the Stars and lose 4-2.
Jim and his team sat back enjoying their drinks, basking in the warm glow of a great recovery and victory. 
Finally best wishes to Graham, we hope to see him back on the piste before too long.
(Eds Note: Graham had an operation on his leg and will be out of the game for several weeks. He also had a brain scan but nothing was found.....!!).
Thanks Jon, super article and readers might be interested to see the Angels team clad in their sartorial elegance on the photos page of the website.
Should any budding reporters out there wish to send in a match report, or any other items of interest for that matter, please do so.
Onto the rest of the report....
New Inn increased their lead at the top of Div One with a win over Bells whilst Brecon could only draw with the mercurial Cruisers. Abersinya have slipped lower down after a heavy defeat by the Sundowners and Nags ‘A’ came up with a tight draw against Tram Wheels.
In div two, Golds and ‘Too’ fought a terrific scrap with ‘Too’ taking the honours 1 – 5.
Games finished 11-13 11-13 12-13 11-13 9-13 13-4. It could so easily have been 5 – 1 to the Golds but that’s petanque.
Nomads have now opened an eleven point lead at the top of the div with a decisive win over bottom club Nags ‘B’. Cross Angels crashed to Ron’s Bridge team and that’s now two defeats in a row for our vice-chairman’s team. Their aspirations to be promoted definitely taking a nosedive.

Division Two
Bridge Inn v Nomads Draw
Yew Tree v Cross Angels Away Win
New Inn Golds v Tram Sleepers Draw
Tram Tracks v New Inn Too Home Win
Madley Lions v Black Swans Home Win

Division One
Seven Stars v Leis Cruisers Draw
Aberhonddu v Angel Inn Away Win
New Inn v Sundowners Draw
Tram Wheels v Bells Almeley Home Win
Strand & Dlvr v Nags Head ‘A’ Home Win